Today I’m going to introduce you to my Protagonists in my current
zombie creeper WIP. I’ve stated before, these four remarkable children are loosly based on my own four remarkable kids.
Two kids answer the door to an old two story farm house. I had been knocking on many houses. This is the first where someone didn't want to eat me.
A boy and girl rush me in, block the door with an old china cabinet and take me up a narrow staircase booby-trapped with snares and bells.
In a bedroom another younger boy and a toddler play with dolls and cars.
Hi, I’m Danielle.
I’m Gabe. the oldest boy said. This is Alexis, Kylar, and Nahlani.
How old are you?
Gabe – I’m thirteen, Alexis is twelve, Kylar is nine and Nahlani is almost three.
You could cut the tension with a knife. I needed to have them trust me.
Umm, so do you guys have a favorite animal?
Gabe – One that doesn’t want to eat me. The other day we had seen a half-eaten dog laying in a gully. If Alex hadn’t pusheded me, it would have bitten my leg off.
Alexis – True story.
Kylar – It was the most disgusting thing I have ever seen.
Nahlani – Gusting!
What do miss about breakfast.
Alexis – One that I don’t have to kill. Mom always warned us ‘bout survival. I guess Papa would take her out hunting and fishing or something like that. Too bad she didn’t teach me how to skin a animal. She shows me cuts on her hand. I got these from trying to get the guts out of a rabbit yesterday.
Gabe – I want biscuits and gravy. He licks his lips.
Kylar – Anything mom cooked. I miss her pancakes.
Nahlani – Milk.
Kylar – She really likes her milk.
What is your biggest fear?
Gabe – Dying. My biggest fear is one of us dying.
Alexis – Never seeing mom again.
Where is your mom?
Alexis – Probably bitten or worse, dead.
Gabe – Worse! Sneering at Alex. I think walking around searching for my next kill is worse than being dead.
Alexis – Ha! That’s funny.
Gabe – Why is that funny?
Alexis – ‘Cause isn’t that what we’re doing?
Gabe – That’s different.
Alexis – Shrugs
Kylar and Nahlani leave to play in the corner of the bedroom.
When I came to the house you answered the door brandishing a gun. Where did you get it?
Gabe – Mom. She left it with us.
Alexis –She said she felt better with us having it.
Gabe – She said we had a better chance of making it if we had the only weapon.
Have you used it?
Gabe – Yeah. I had to shoot the neighbor when she charged at us. I couldn’t get her off the van.
Alexis – I haven’t yet but Kylar has.
Kylar – It was cool. A light twinkled in his eye.
Gabe – He scared the crap out of me. I thought he was aiming at me. You know, like he had lost his mind.
Kylar – Chuckling. He didn’t know a creeper was right behind him.
Gabe – Right behind me.
And your dad?
Gabe – Never came home from work the night all heck broke loose.
Were those horses I seen in the living room down stairs?
Alexis – Yup. We had to save them. I almost died trying to shovel them out.
Shovel them out?
Alexis – Yeah. Shoots a stern look at Gabe. Brainiac over here thought it would be easier to travel on a horse then walk.
Gabe – It is!
Alexis – He didn’t mention I could die.
Gabe – How was I supposed to know?
Alexis – A creeper was in there.
Kylar – She almost died.
Alexis – Rolls her eyes. Thanks Captain Obvious. Yeah I was shoveling out the biggest pile of horse crap. Scrunches her nose. It smelled soooo bad. Smells her hands. I can still smell it. Anyways. So I’m shoveling, right. Well I hear this low rumbly sound from behind me. I turned and there it was. A creeper! Practically steaming up my glasses.
Gabe – She screamed so loud I thought she would wake the dead.
Alexis – Shoots a look. I laugh at the ironic statement. Anyways. He comes barreling at me and knocks me to the ground.
Gabe – Little did she know –
Alexis – Shut up! I’m telling the story. I fall into the poop. Rolls eyes again. The poop. Ugh.
Gabe – I come running over and find the creeper on her and she’s still screaming.
Alexis – My story. Shut up! Here I had stabbed the creeper with my pitchfork. Her hands mimic the motions. Right through his head.
Kylar – Right through. It was awesome!
Gabe – How do you know? You weren’t even there.
Kylar – Yes I was!
Gabe – He came running in with Lani, pointing the gun at me … again.
Kylar – Mouths the word what and throws up his hands.
How close are you to your Nanny and Papa’s?
Gabe – Shrugs. I think we’re close. If my memory serves me right, we should be about half way there. I lost the map she drew.
Alexis – If memory serves you?
Gabe – I don’t know. It’s something mom always said.
Alexis – I don’t remember.
Gabe – Nobody asked you anyways.
If you want I can go with you and make sure you make it.
Gabe and Alexis look at one another.
Gabe – No thanks, we can manage.
Alexis – He means to say. We don’t trust anyone. You seem really nice lady but we can make it on our own.
Kylar – Can she at least stay the night tonight? So we’re not so lonely.
Gabe – You can eat dinner but then you have to go. His hand moves towards the pistol by his side.
Dinner is fine. Thank you. I eat dinner and help the kids clean up. Gabe asks me to put Lani and Kylar to bed, something about a woman’s’ touch. Lani tells me gibberish tales of her mom and dad and they giggle themselves to slumber.
Later Gabe and Alexis walk me out and shut the door behind me. I hear them slide the china cabinet over to block the door and feet pad up the stairs.
I turn from the house checking my clip. Two rounds left. I had six. I figured the kids needed them more than me.
This is great! I love how they all have unique voices, and they really, really sound like kids too. Excellent work!ReplyDelete
Try living with them. Ugh, I read this to them and all agreed. I know them pretty well.Delete
I love that the little kid said "pusheded." My kids totally used to talk like that.ReplyDelete
I tried to be true to each kid and I think I did pretty well. Thanks!Delete
That was amazing. I really liked the kids, particularly the older two (more aware of the horrors). And I love the end of the interview. Almost like it morphed into a story itself.ReplyDelete
In real life, they are very tuned into their surroundings and right vs wrong.Delete
I love this! The kids' voices are great! :)ReplyDelete
Try living with them. lol Thanks!Delete
I have never thought about doing an "interview" with my main characters before, this is great! Plus, what a fun read... you really do nail the kids' language. I am very excited to keep reading your whole story!ReplyDelete
You should. It's great way to get to them better. Even tho they are "yours" you still can develpe them more and connect better. IMO anyways.Delete
I love the voice in this interview. Each character is distinct.ReplyDelete
Thanks Kenzie! I see your second chapter of Tread Lightly is out! So excited.Delete
Teeheee this was really good I enjoyed the kids voices!ReplyDelete
Excellent job! You've got their "voices" down pat.ReplyDelete