Thursday, May 31, 2012

Thursday Ugh


Typing this - I can barely keep my eyes open.


Damn Hatfield and McCoy keeping me up all hours of the night.

First I watched and then I dreamt.

Then my kids were making fun of me cause I was talking all crazy and crap. Tarnation!

Got me a cherry pie in the baker this mornin y'all. No Seriously. I put one of those pot pie pies in the easy bake toaster oven here at work.


Oops sorry. Dozed off.

Yesterday - besides staying up to damn long - I registered my daughter at her new school. The day before - Tuesday - I did the same for my son. Back in February we moved from our small country town to a much larger city. And the past few months I have been driving my kids an hour to school everyday so they could finish at their old schools.

My oldest is going to be a Freshman. FRESHMAN (good song)! We picking his classes while he himmed and hawed about it. See, he has played the trumpet for three years in Middle school and didn't know if he wanted to continue with it. After a few minutes he chose German and Graphic Design as his electives. I am just proud he made a choice. It usually takes him FOREVER!

Next was my second oldest and she's starting the 7th grade next year. She also plays an instrument - flute - and wasn't sure if she wanted to do band again. She didn't. She selected Art, Computer Tech, and TV Production plus PE.

PE Uuuggghhh!

Ok, so when I saw TV Production as a choice, I was so jealous! Where the heck was that when I was in school? Granted it was 22 years ago since I was in the 7th grade and I went to this rinky-dink podunk country school, but still. Jealous!

Kid #3 is going to the 4th grade so he is still forced to take whatever the school wants him too and my youngest is 2 and I'm not sending her off quite yet.

Have a great Thursday and try to stay awake!

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Mermaids, Hatfields and McCoys

Still frame from video of creature on the beach
Ok, ok... did anyone see Mermaids: The Body Found this weekend on Animal Planet? It was featured during Monsters Week. Anyways ... talk about freakin' me the freak out. Personally I thought the creature on the beach was a bit fake looking and really ... did those two boys really just "stumble" across it? No?! Yeah, me either.

Oh, don't get me wrong, I would flippin' keel over and die if Mermaids, Mermen, Merperson's were are real. I mean, where did all the legends come from anyways? And I'm not just talking about Mercreatures, I'm talking about all the kit-and-cuboodle. Vampires, Lockness, Werewolves, Ghosts, Fairies, and so-on. Ya know - the things that go bumps in the night.

The legends had to come from somewhere, right?!


Just nod your head. That's right, just nod.

Moving on -

Last night I stayed up WAY past my beddiby to watch Hatfields and McCoys. You know ... the damned feud over a pig. A PIG!

My opinion (which really means nothing) is ... the pig wasn't the cause of the feud. It was mearly the straw that broke the camels back.

Randolph "Ole Ran'l" McCoy was pissed the William Anderson "Devil Anse" Hatfield went AWOL and left his war brothers behind. Hey, Hatfield told McCoy that it was a fools mission to carry on and he wasn't wrong. After Hatfield left, McCoy and seven other survivors were housed in a prison camp in OH. After the war was over, McCoy came home to a town the Hatfields ruled.

The Hatfields took back what was wrongfully stolen by the McCoys and it didn't sit well with Ole Ran'l. Then here comes a Hatfield strolling along with the runaway pig Randolph family lost. It was the cottonpickin' ear mark.

During Trial a McCoy flopped and sided with the Hatfields. Everything went downhill from there. All Hell broke loose.

Men were killing one-a-notha. Y'all.

Johnson Hatfield and Roseanna McCoy couldn't be together. And it left off with Devil gathering fella's up to rescue his boy who was to be murdered by dawn.

Did anybody else stay up too damn late to watch it? *Yawns*

What did you think of the Mermaids? Real/fake?

Who do you side with? Hatfields/McCoys?

Are you related to them? Their kin-folk are everywhere. I researched it! Honest!

Friday, May 25, 2012

Memorial Wkend & Funny Friday

It's also the last day of school for the kids and this makes me uber excited.


I love my kids at home. I know where they are. I know what they're eating. I know what they're playing. And I KNOW they are not being picked on or BULLIED. Ho hum.

In honor of the forth-coming Memorial Weekend, I'm giving a little tribute shoutout for my brother...

2002 - I was 9 months prego in this pic. Oh my word, I'm HID! EE! OUS!

PFC. Anthony Wagner
June 1980 - November 2002

Ok so now on to the funny part...

Last week we were packing the van up to go the lake.

I was in the back loading up sand toys and whatnot when I heard my two yr old say and I shit smurf you not...

"Can someone get my door peaze... Jeezus!"

I about died! ... Laughing that is.

Next thing I hear...

"Danielle! That's all you!"

Now I'm getting reprimanded by my husband. I do have to admit, I'm the "Jeezus" name dropper. My husband is the "Jackass" dropper. So needless to say I have my hands full and by my own accord.

But if I get called "Jackass" one more time I'm slapping my husbands mouth and not my daughters'.

Happy Friday and have a SAFE Memorial Weekend.


Thursday, May 24, 2012

My Protagonist Interview

Today I’m going to introduce you to my Protagonists in my current zombie creeper WIP. I’ve stated before, these four remarkable children are loosly based on my own four remarkable kids.

Interview style:

Two kids answer the door to an old two story farm house. I had been knocking on many houses. This is the first where someone didn't want to eat me.

A boy and girl rush me in, block the door with an old china cabinet and take me up a narrow staircase booby-trapped with snares and bells.

In a bedroom another younger boy and a toddler play with dolls and cars.

Hi, I’m Danielle.

I’m Gabe. the oldest boy said. This is Alexis, Kylar, and Nahlani.

How old are you?
GabeI’m thirteen, Alexis is twelve, Kylar is nine and Nahlani is almost three.

You could cut the tension with a knife. I needed to have them trust me.

Umm, so do you guys have a favorite animal?
GabeOne that doesn’t want to eat me. The other day we had seen a half-eaten dog laying in a gully. If Alex hadn’t pusheded me, it would have bitten my leg off.
AlexisTrue story.
KylarIt was the most disgusting thing I have ever seen.

What do miss about breakfast.
AlexisOne that I don’t have to kill. Mom always warned us ‘bout survival. I guess Papa would take her out hunting and fishing or something like that. Too bad she didn’t teach me how to skin a animal. She shows me cuts on her hand. I got these from trying to get the guts out of a rabbit yesterday.
GabeI want biscuits and gravy. He licks his lips.
KylarAnything mom cooked. I miss her pancakes.
KylarShe really likes her milk.

What is your biggest fear?
GabeDying. My biggest fear is one of us dying.
AlexisNever seeing mom again.

Where is your mom?
AlexisProbably bitten or worse, dead.
GabeWorse! Sneering at Alex. I think walking around searching for my next kill is worse than being dead.
AlexisHa! That’s funny.
GabeWhy is that funny?
Alexis – ‘Cause isn’t that what we’re doing?
GabeThat’s different.
Alexis – Shrugs
Kylar and Nahlani leave to play in the corner of the bedroom.

When I came to the house you answered the door brandishing a gun. Where did you get it?
Gabe Mom. She left it with us.

AlexisShe said she felt better with us having it.
GabeShe said we had a better chance of making it if we had the only weapon.

Have you used it?
GabeYeah. I had to shoot the neighbor when she charged at us. I couldn’t get her off the van.
AlexisI haven’t yet but Kylar has.
KylarIt was cool. A light twinkled in his eye.
GabeHe scared the crap out of me. I thought he was aiming at me. You know, like he had lost his mind.
Kylar – Chuckling. He didn’t know a creeper was right behind him.
GabeRight behind me.

And your dad?
Gabe – Never came home from work the night all heck broke loose.

Were those horses I seen in the living room down stairs?
AlexisYup. We had to save them. I almost died trying to shovel them out.

Shovel them out?
AlexisYeah. Shoots a stern look at Gabe. Brainiac over here thought it would be easier to travel on a horse then walk.
GabeIt is!
AlexisHe didn’t mention I could die.
GabeHow was I supposed to know?

Know what?
AlexisA creeper was in there.
Kylar She almost died.
Alexis – Rolls her eyes. Thanks Captain Obvious. Yeah I was shoveling out the biggest pile of horse crap. Scrunches her nose. It smelled soooo bad. Smells her hands. I can still smell it. Anyways. So I’m shoveling, right. Well I hear this low rumbly sound from behind me. I turned and there it was. A creeper! Practically steaming up my glasses.
GabeShe screamed so loud I thought she would wake the dead.
Alexis – Shoots a look. I laugh at the ironic statement. Anyways. He comes barreling at me and knocks me to the ground.
GabeLittle did she know –
AlexisShut up! I’m telling the story. I fall into the poop. Rolls eyes again. The poop. Ugh.
GabeI come running over and find the creeper on her and she’s still screaming.
Alexis – My story. Shut up! Here I had stabbed the creeper with my pitchfork. Her hands mimic the motions. Right through his head.
KylarRight through. It was awesome!
GabeHow do you know? You weren’t even there.
KylarYes I was!
GabeHe came running in with Lani, pointing the gun at me … again.
Kylar – Mouths the word what and throws up his hands.

How close are you to your Nanny and Papa’s?
Gabe – Shrugs. I think we’re close. If my memory serves me right, we should be about half way there. I lost the map she drew.
AlexisIf memory serves you?
GabeI don’t know. It’s something mom always said.
AlexisI don’t remember.
GabeNobody asked you anyways.

If you want I can go with you and make sure you make it.
Gabe and Alexis look at one another.
Gabe No thanks, we can manage.
AlexisHe means to say. We don’t trust anyone. You seem really nice lady but we can make it on our own.
KylarCan she at least stay the night tonight? So we’re not so lonely.
GabeYou can eat dinner but then you have to go. His hand moves towards the pistol by his side.

Dinner is fine. Thank you. I eat dinner and help the kids clean up. Gabe asks me to put Lani and Kylar to bed, something about a woman’s’ touch. Lani tells me gibberish tales of her mom and dad and they giggle themselves to slumber.

Later Gabe and Alexis walk me out and shut the door behind me. I hear them slide the china cabinet over to block the door and feet pad up the stairs.

I turn from the house checking my clip. Two rounds left. I had six. I figured the kids needed them more than me.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Does Your Smurfy Side Show in Your Writing?

Wednesdays: May I ask something about you?
Ask your followers something about themselves. 

I asked the kids the other day, “What do you think I should ask my followers?” Everything my kids offered, I shot down, letting them know that I had already talked about it. UNTIL my wise-guy teen son said “Have you introduced them to your East Coast alter ego?” “Ummm, no, I haven’t.” “Well maybe you should see how many of them swear smurf.” So I thought... Smurf it! Why not?!

I’ve never lived on the East Coast and have no idea where I get my accent from. My look-a-like cousin also has an accent. Granted my accent only comes out when I’m pissed smurffed or have been drinking. Oh the alcohol-induced-East-Coast drunken nights.

I’m gonna give you some examples…

If my daughter was to tell me to “shut up”…

My response – “Excuse me! You better watch yur mouth before I wash it full’a soup. You understand me. And don’t even think about rollin’ yur eyes at me or I’m gonna beat yur butt.” – No people I don’t actually beat their butts but they get the drift.”

NOW if some random girl at a bar, or after I’ve been drinking, told me to “shut up”…

My response – “Oh hell no! Listen here you punk *ss b*tch. Yur about two seconds away from getting yur *ss beat. If I was you, I’d turn and walk the otha way before I bust out o’my skin and rip ya f*ckin’ face off.” – As you can see my hubby stopped taking me out so much though he says he loves picking fights with me cause he loves it when I get all feisty!

OR lets take my same response and smurf it up a bit - “Oh smurf no! Listen here you punk smurf smurfette. Yur about two seconds away from getting yur smurf beat. If I was you, I’d turn and walk the otha way before I bust out o’my skin and rip ya smurfin’ face off.”

As you can tell I swear A LOT! I’ve been working on it lately. Promise.

I’m actually a really nice girl. I’m loving and caring, and a hoot to be around but don’t cross me. I probably get my “bulldog” attitude from my mom. We both stand 5’2” but we carry a lot of bite with our bark.

How does this relate to my writing? I ALWAYS have my ying and yang sides portrayed on paper. One is grounded, well liked, considerate, and loving. The other is “East Coast” b*tch, strong-willed, disobedient, but also very loyal.

So how does your inner persona’s affect your writing? How smurfy do you get?

Happy Hump Day!

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Flash Fiction Blogfest

Here are the rules:
1. Entries must begin with the two words: Lightning flashed.
2. Entries must be 300 words or less and be in prose. I'm not versed enough in poetry verse to judge it properly.
3. Entries must be posted on your blog between May 21 - 23.
4. You must sign up in the linky to have your entry be counted.
If you want to join in, the host of the blogfest is located here: Cherie Reich's blog.

Here's my entry; the mind of a thirteen year old boy; from Unsurvive

Lightning flashed across the countryside, bringing to life the unstill night. A pod of creepers move from one house to the next in the distance, I'm assuming, scavenging for whatever living creature roams in their path.

Down on the road a few stragglers shuffle by. They’re grotesque but I can’t help but stare from the second story window.
Nahlani stirs in the large bed, probably searching for me but I can’t sleep. She hasn’t cried out for mom yet but it’ll happen. A day hasn’t gone by without her crying for her.

Alexis’ arms cocoon Kylar in the smaller bed we stole for the room across the hall. Both are snoring.

We haven’t slept in real beds for – how many days now? I can’t remember. The days run together. If mom was still around I’m sure she’d know what day it was.
How could she have left us? I don’t understand. She said she would be right back. She promised.

I told her to take her gun but she wouldn’t. It’s all her fault; leaving me in charge. I’m not even old enough to take care of myself.

At least I kept my promise and left our house if she wasn’t back within twenty-four hours. Unfortunately I lost the piece of paper she gave me with the directions to Nanny and Papa’s house.
Now we're in some stranger’s house.

We finished barring up the windows and doors to keep the passing creepers out. The previous owner started but something bad must have happened.

We think the creeper, Alexis killed in the barn, must have been him.

The horses we took from the barn are sleeping in the living room for now. Horses in the living room – mom would not approve. But then again she’s not here is she.

Monday, May 21, 2012

ROAK, Awards, and 20 Honest Statements

Andrea @ The Enchanted Writer gave me some major props in her ROAK post here, along with many other awesome bloggers! Go check her out.

Now on to the Awards!

Laura @ My Baffling Brain bestowed upon me the Kreativ Blogger Award!

So a huge shout-out to her and all of her awesomeness!

And this award goes to...
The Enchanted Writer
A2Z Mommy and Whats In Between

Cassie @ Cassie Mae presented me with the Real Trooper Award.

I was so excited for this award. I saw this on another bloogers page and covetted it. And then YAY! Go see what Cassie is all about.

And this award goes to...
Bouquet of Books

Lastly the sharing part...
Instead of doing the Random Facts about myself I am going to spice it up with 20 Honest Statements Hazel @ Pablo's Angel did and inspired me to the same. It involves listing 20 things you want to say to certain people but you know that you never will. You can't say who they are either.

1. Please don't pretend to like me in front of watchful eyes.
2. F*ck off!
3. Take this job and shove it!
4. If I wanted to be walked all over I'd lay down at the front door.
5. I actually loved you.
6. I'd rather be somewhere else.
7. I'd rather be hanging out with someone else.
8. You need to brush your teeth.
9. Stop complaining about your weight when you are shoving ho-ho's into your piehole.
10. I stopped playing your games a long time ago.
11. When are you going to get over yourself.
12. You might think your sh!t don't stink but your farts are killing me.
13. You look at me like that one more time and you're gonna get b!tch slapped.
14. Have you stopped pretending yet?
15. Just cause we're family doesn't mean I like you. (<-- This has nothing to do with MY side of the family)
16. I dare you.
17. Can you smack your face into my hand?
18. You should NOT be wearing that.
19. You're a b!tch. Period.
20. If you look at the twins one more time, you're gonna get two black eyes and I won't be using my hands.

Ok - so some of these I WOULD probably say - but still - you get the point.

Happy Monday!

Friday, May 18, 2012

BMM - Friday Funnies

Here are some Friday Funnies that's a must! If you read yesterdays post - I fixed those frames. *pats self on back*

It's kind of small but it reads:
I hope for his sake there is some photoshop invloved here.

I love cats. LMFAO!! Seriously, the cats are cracking my shizz up! And that baby! So funny.

Happy Friday Y'all! Have great weekend and see you all Monday!

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Most Likely I'm Talking About You Today

Oh brother, this is totally going to be a Monday-like day. Yesterday I had to help my parents move stuff from their house and I was gifted with a ton of gorgeous picture frames. Unfortunately I didn't have time to unload them from the van because I had to unload the other items that were gifted to my kids. Weeeellllll, this morning when I got to work... I opened the sliding door to get my purse and 5 of the frames came crashing to the pavement. Holy Hell! I spent a good part of my morning picking up wood and glass.

*hangs head in shame* Just breathe, they're only frames.

Anywho - today for BMM I'm going to list some of my top 13 blogs - because I couldn't settle on 10 and 13 is supposed to be lucky -right?!. It was very difficult to choose but I had to stop somewhere. These bloggers are in NO particular order of favoritism.

Angela Cothran - Angela is the one that brings me my Won't You Be My Neighbor segments that introduce me to some fabulous bloggers if I haven't met them already.

Aloha Mark Koopman Says hi Form HI - Mark Koopman cracks my shizz up and can't seem to get Proper names correct.

Geeky Tendencies - Jeremy brings with him the knowledge of gaming and great advice and comments. His a great addition to the blogosphere.

Bouquet of Books - If you visit often then you know I did an interview with Jackie last Thursday. She is always understanding and has great insight to the writing world. She helped me find my love of writing.

Write Here, Write Now - Kyra leaves funny and engouraging comments. She a loyal blogging friend.

Mina Burrows - Mina and I have a lot of things in common except I don't have Fred (her four-legged buddy). And even though she has over 1400 followers, she still visits me often.

The Daily Dose - Dana shares my sense of humor and being a mother herself, we share a lot of the same feelings and life experiences. Even though I haven't met her kids, I feel like I know them already. Oh the joys of parenthood.

Spirit Called - I met Huntress during the A to Z challenge and so glad I did. Her Friday Funnies crack me up and she loves movies. You had me at Hello!

Cassie Mae - If you haven't met Cassie yet then you should. She's the Bee's Knee's. Seriously. Funny! No holds bar, and says what she means and means what she says. There is no grey with her. Have I mentioned she's funny, like HA-larious! You can also find her at Falling For Fiction.

Between the Bookends - Kelley is someone that I was immediately drawn to. It might not be reciprocated but there's something about Mary Kelley Lynn that makes me like her. She's friendly and positive and is part of the great blogging group Falling For Fiction.

Pensuasion - S. L. Hennessy is my sci-fi guru. I'm sure in the real world we would be buddies. She'd be the first person to ask to go to a sci-fi, horror, thriller, action, etc. movie with you.

GrowingUp YA - Kristin aka "New York" was one of my very first friends in the blogosphere. She does wonderful book reviews and is a co-host for Blogspiration Sundays with saz101. Super funny and has already been established as a zombie killing ally.

The High Cost of the Low Living - Bushman is a dudes, dude. Beer drinkin, deer hunting, garden growing kind of guy. Also met during the A to Z Challenge. Snarky, clever blogger. You wanna know about gardening, he's the man.

Honorable Mentions - cause I said it was hard to choose dangit!

The Ubiquitous Perspective, Alex J. Cavanaugh, The Quintessentially Questionable Query Experiment, Clarissa Draper, Tasha Seegmiller, Geeky DaddyMiranda Hardy,  I solemly swear that I'm up to a book.
Ok I have to stop somewhere. Have a great Thursday!

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Let Me Ask You Sumpthin

In true BMM form; today is Wednesday and that means I get to ask you something.

I'm gonna ask you a series of questions. All you need to do is answer them. Easy-peasy. One or the other...

a.) Book version or
b.) Book to movie adaptation
     i.) Twilight
     ii.) Harry Potter
     iii.) Lord of the Rings or
     iv.) Hunger Games

a.) Lost or
b.) Surivivor

a.) Horror/Thiller/Sci-fi or
b.) Romance/Chick-flick/Feel-food

a.) Winter
b.) Spirng
c.) Summer or
d.) Autumn

a.) Mario
b.) Luigi
c.) Peach or
d.) Toad

a.) Tattoo or
b.) No Tattoo

a.) Final Fantasy or
b.) Zelda

a.) E-Reader or
b.) Book w/ pages

a.) Vampire Diaries or
b.) True Blood

a.) Reading or
b.) Writing

And just to make it fair; my answers are...
b, ii, a, a, d, d, a, b, b(although I LOVE my e-reader), b, a

or if you prefer...
Movies, HP, Lost, Horror/thiller/sci-fi, Autumn, Toad, Tattoos, Zelda, Actual Books, True Blood, & Reading

You may answer in any form you like.

Thanks for participating! Happy Hump Day!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Whats Happening Lately

Well this morning I finally got around to signing up for 5k zombie obsticle course. I knew what the premise was all about but then (after I signed up) I started looking at some of the images online and this is what popped up...

WHAT WAS I THINKING? I just have to face the fact that I'm probably going to be infected by the end of it.

I'm currently having a GIVEAWAY!

Over the weekend I received an email from the lovely Author, Emily Casey, asking me if I’d like to read and review her novella Cinderella and Zombies. She also approved this GIVEAWAY. How cool of her.
To enter, please go here and signup to participate!

Back in April, Jackie @ Bouquet of Books and I first posted about the
First Fight/First Kiss Blogfest 
Why is it perfect?
While Jackie adores the kissing and hand holding scenes, I’m the “give me fat lips and magical dueling any day of the week” type girl, the bloodier the better. Though Jackie also likes fight scenes; I HATE to write love scenes. I find it difficult to get in touch with my soft side. This blogfest forces many of us to work on other scenes that we may not like and make them shine.
Also what happens after a good argument? - Making up!

Share your 1st FIGHT and 1st KISS scenes in your MS’s or WIP’s. Crack open your current project or dive back into an old one. We want to feel what your characters feel. From the sting of their first fist-to-the-face to the tingling taste of their first kiss.

If you’re not a writer, please share with us your real life firsts. We want to read and experience them all!
The First Fight/First Kiss blogfest will go as such: 
  • Post 1 will be on Tuesday, June 12 - Share with us your 1st FIGHT scene on your blog. It can be physical or verbal, fists or magic. Whichever you want to share.
  • Post 2 will be on Thursday, June 14 - Share with us your 1st KISS scene on your blog. It can be a peck on the cheek or a full fledge kissing session. Whatever you would like to tell us.
Details for the First Fight/First Kiss blogfest:
  • Sign up using the linky thingie below.
  • Display the gorgeous First Fight/First Kiss Blogfest button on your blog. Go grab our button on the left sidebar.
  • Post your 1st fight entry on June 12, 2012.
  • Post your 1st kiss entry on June 14, 2012.
  • Hop around to the other blogs and comment on their wonderful 1st fight and 1st kiss scenes.
Prizes? Absolutely! Jackie and I will each pick our favorite scene from each day. That’s 4 prizes total, folks. What are the fabulous gifts for the winners? $10 email-giftcards to Amazon or Barnes & Noble so you can choose that book you’ve been wanting or download it to your Kindle or Nook.

You can sign up on the Linky in the upper left side bar on my page or click here.

Lastly. I wanted to say THANK YOU to all of the people out there that posted on my First Loves blog yesterday. I did visit everyones pages. If you do not a have a comment from me, this means you didn't have your post up yet. If I missed you please let me know, if not, I will make the rounds again.

Thanks again to Alex for hosting such a fun hop/fest! I followed and gained some new followers!