Friday, July 6, 2012

Ask and You Shall Recieve

Yesterday I was asked when I would be blogging next because they wanted to be entertained. My answer was next week because I had decided to take this week off with the holiday and such [as].

Well now that I'm at work and the only one in my department... I thought What the hell... lets post something entertaining-like. So I whipped the following up. You may critique if your like, I don't mind. It's a rough, rough, write. The show-don't-tell needs some major re-work.

Hope your entertained for now!


Her dreams. White walls. White floor. White ceiling. Or is it nothing? Nothing at all. Does she float? Is she floating?
A white abyss. Peaceful. Silence. Her ears don’t ring. She. Hears. Nothing.
Her eyes. Are they open? Are they closed? She can’t tell for the light is blinding. Is there a difference in the stark of the white?
Her limbs are lifeless, the way she likes it. She can’t even tell if she’s breathing. Should she be? The need for sir doesn’t consume her.
Warmness washes over her, tingling her toes and fingers. The numbness her body has been experiencing the past few hour’s dissipates. Here comes the cool rush over her drifting her back to consciousness. She can tell her slumber is coming to an end. It always ends this way. Warm, then cold, then aware.
A sound! She… hears… engines. Engines and padding feet. Feet, feet, feet, the mind drifts. Playing with her sleepy mind she tries to persuade it from waking.
Unfortunately the padding continues to get closer. The familiar creek of the door fully wakes her but her eyes stay firmly shut. The body taking in its first conscious breath.
“What?” The venom spews from her lips.
“You need to get up Lenay,” her sister spits. “Mom said to get up now. You need to come see this!”
I need to come see this? Lenay thinks. Her sister has got to be kidding her. Their mothers’ lame-brained idea to rouse her from sleep no doubt. Every weekend their mother has some ridiculous plan to drag them from the house. “Lenay you need to get out more. You’ll become a lazy slob with no future.” Maybe that’s Lenay’s life plan. Lazy. Slob, No future. Her mother acts like she’s never been seventeen before.
Lenay’s body lifts from the down mattress, involuntarily of course. The everyday movement of the body is a funny thing. Doing things subconsciously to where no thought process is necessary.
The sounds of her naked feet echo down the hall as she quickly, and awkwardly approach the living room. Between the moments Lenay left the comforts of her bed and the contact with the cold wood floors, her eyes had cracked open. In her line of sight is the ugliest but most comfortable lazyboy and that is where she plans on plopping her body once she makes it there.
“Lenay! We’re in here!”
Damn! So close.
“What?” A whine slips through her barely parted lips.
“Come see this,” Their mother chirps.
“You won’t believe it!” her sister cries.
“Shhh Maggie. I can’t hear,” Mother firmly presses a finger to her lips. Lenay hated the way she shushed people, like some stupid librarian. Visions of Lenay slapping Mother flashes before her eyes.
“So what am I seeing here? A movie? You got me out of bed to watch a movie?”
“No. It’s on the news,” Their mother rebuttals.
“It’s Nine Eleven all over again,” Maggie says before Lenay could turn and stammer back to my bed.
A heave of breath leaves her lungs as she falls to the awaiting couch below. With a “humph” and a few blinks of her eyes, she focus in the images on the screen.
Moments before her eyes could see, she hears a reporter babbling on about a plane that had crashed into the Gateway Arch. “Really, the Arch. Why would someone want to purposely crash into that? What a funny thing for terrorist to kill themselves over. I mean really.” Lenay hissed.
“They don’t think its terrorists. Some reporter from Seattle said all planes traveling from Newark are crashing.” Mother mumbles through bitten nails.
“Yeah, he said one went down in the middle of a subdivision, wiping out, like, thirty houses.” Maggie stands from her beanbag chair, grabs the cat and plops down next to me. “Didn’t you hear it? It’s like two miles away.”
“Maybe, I don’t know. I thought I heard something.” They sit and stare at the events which  plaster the screen.
Knickers, the cat purrs to the rhythm of swipes Maggie makes through its mangy orange hair. As Lenay stares at the chaos, her ears draw in the purrs. She wants to hit the cat. No. Correction. What she really want to do is pick that cat up and chuck it across the room.
He taunts her, Knickers. If Mags wasn’t up already this morning, that stupid cat would have been perched on Lenay’s chest breathing in the air that was meant for her. It never fails.
“What is that?” Mother startles Lenay.
“What?” she shout, still trying to get her heart back to normal rhythm.
“That,” she points, “that, right there. Do you see it?”
“Someone survived!” Lenay exclaims.
Mother and Maggie look at her. Their shocking expression left a sour taste in her mouth.
Maggie smiles. “Look at that. Doom-and-gloom actually has a soft side.”
“Oh shut up!” Lenay swats at her in disgust. “Seriously though. It’s a miracle. How can someone walk out of something like that?”
The man staggers from a huge hole which is engulfed in flames. “Do you see that?” The news lady says.
Apparently before you. Even in holy terror Lenay’s mind still drips with sarcasm.
“Paramedics have finally arrived.” She presses on her earpiece to hear over the sirens. “I’ve been told that a total of fifteen planes have crashed due to unknown causes.”
Unknown causes? She’s extremely resourceful, this one. Lenay’s mind continues to rant.
Shots ring out from behind the broadcaster, jolting Lenay from where she sits. “Get down! Get down! Shots fired! Shots fired!” A man’s voice comes through the TV.
A flash comes from the left side of the screen, knocking the lady to the ground and along with it, the camera, “Get off! Get off!” The lady shrieks, kicking and writhing. Screaming she kicks at a woman in a business suit. “Get off!” Business Suit lurches for the lady again.
Lenay’s heart races with fear and excitement. She can’t believe what she’s seeing. “What’s happening? Why isn’t someone helping?” Her eyes sweep the room to find Mother curled up in the chair with a nail in her mouth and Maggie staring at the screen in shock.
“Ahhh!” Maggie screams, “What was that?”
“The door.” Lenay runs to the front door.
Standing behind the painted glass door, in all camouflage, was an older guy wielding a rifle. “May I come in?”
“MOM!” Lenay shout.
This guy doesn’t even wait. He takes two large steps inside. “Sure, oh please, won’t you come in.” He doesn’t thank her. Ass!
“Ma’am, I’m going to have to ask you and your girls to exit the house. Are you the only ones here? Do I need to contact your husband?” The gruff man directs them to the door.
“No, I’m not married,” she pauses, “Can we grab a few belongings? My girls and I are still in our pajamas”
“Sure. Make it quick. No longer than five minutes. I need you out by the truck then. Do you understand?”
She nods. “Girls, hurry! You heard then man.”
Maggie grabs Lenay’s arm, dragging her down the hall. “Hurry Nay. Grab essentials.” Turning, she bolts across the hall to her room, already stripping down to her scibbies. Lenay hated being called Nay. But then again she hate a lot of things.
Essentials, essentials. Mimicking her sister, Lenay tears off her t-shirt and shorts, almost ripping them clean off. Essentials, hmmm. She grabs the closest pair of jeans, sniffs, shrugs, and pulls them on, falling on to the bed. Standing, she grabs a white tee and throws it over her head. Two hands grab the sides and pull down. “I said hurry. What’s taking so long?” Maggie says tossing a sweatshirt, socks, underwear, a brush, a few more tees and Lenay’s shoes into a bag.
“Where the heck do you think we’re going? Vacation? I don’t need all of that. Do I?”
“You never know Nay. You have to be prepared for anything. Remember that ok?” She nudges Lenay out the door.


  1. That was crazy. It's rough but I love it. Keep going Danielle. The start of this kind of reminds me of the start of the novel 'Shatter Me' by Tahereh Mafi. One of my favourite lines was:

    Standing behind the painted glass door, in all camouflage, was an older guy wielding a rifle. “May I come in?” dude, mama and the girls are going to fight you off with no defenses. I mean...really? really?

    1. LOL! I know, right?!?! I would probably say yeah too.

      I've never read 'Shatter Me' ... maybe I should.

      Yeah it's really rough. It was one of those things I jotted down a long time ago just to get it down on paper and then never went back to it.

  2. I'm in! At first I thought it was just poetry. I was kinda like oh that's nice, yawn.....but then tah dah! Who does not want to read more of that? Bring it!
    Also I have something for you I just have to wait for my computer to emerge from rehab. It's saved on the hard drive!

    1. Oh I can't wait to see what you have for me!! Come on computer!

      The biginning is exactly how it ends too but with a twist. I think you'd enjoy it. I just need to revise it a thousand more times. lol. A writers life for me.

  3. Danielle, this is ingenious. Looking forward to more!


I heart me some good comments... and pumpkin spice latte's too!