February 10th - Friday - Emotion Flash Fiction
Thanks to Cassie Mae and Angie - I'm Hearing Voice Character Blogfest as been an absolute riot to do. It helped me explore my characters more and meet some great new bloggers. I want to thank everyone for taking the time to read my entries and commenting. The feedback has been encouraging and kind.
Without further ado - here is my Flash Fiction between my protagonist, Reese, and her her sister, Rena - in 250 words (which BTW was very difficult).
“Rena! Stop!” Stephen demands, stepping closer.
Rena raises her hands out to me. Sparks swirl from them, engulfing me. Sufficating. Blue streaks race around my body, forming a paralyzing cocoon, suspending me in mid-air.
“I’m sick of always being in the dark,” I say, but not meaning to or knowing why. “If Sigyn wants her dead, then I will help her.” I realize the words flowing out of my mouth, are not mine, but Rena’s. Our energy, so powerful together, it links us in every way.
“Rena, put her down!” Two voices, my mother and aunts, command.
Balling her hands into fists, “Squeeze,” Rena sang.
My sheath obeyed.
Levona and my mother surround Rena. Mom pulling a slender baton from her boot, as Aunt Lev hoists her staff, pointing it to the ground, a red, electric current, burns a trail behind their every stride, chanting “To be protected from you, This magic ring we will do, With these words we bind thee, For you to let her be, To be protected from your harm, we now seal you with this charm.”
Stephen, Tarrick, Cain, and Amos join in, each one wielding a different color of magic. The glowing ring hovers above the ground at Rena’s waist.
I softly whisper the spell with them. I figure if I’m going to die, why not with my pride attached.
The ring, withers, melting into Rena’s skin. She screams out in agony, wrapping her arms around her stomach. “What did you do?”
Wow! Captivating scene. I wanted it to go on. Great job.
ReplyDeleteThanks, I had to chop the scene in half.
DeleteYeah - second that. It slams right into you and leaves you wanting. More please and all the best xxx
ReplyDeleteThanks, Rusty! I wasn't sure what scene to use.
DeleteAn interesting scene: Rena is attack Reese and these other magic-users (for lack of the term you use) step in to prevent it. They're connected as sisters, but sever the connection to prevent Rena from hurting Reese again. Nice. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to give too much away, but Rena needs to be stopped. They girl are both needed.
DeleteI like family oriented conflict. Makes a scene like this more intense. Much better than merely friends or foes fighting.
ReplyDeleteDitto. You can be enemies w/anyone, but family makes it personal.
DeleteThis is so powerful! Very well written. I enjoyed this very much!
ReplyDeleteThank you. 250 words made it difficult for me. I glad you liked it.
DeleteVery interesting scene! I'd love to find out more.
ReplyDeleteI want to know what happened before AND after. Bravo!
ReplyDeleteDrama, drama, drama. ;)
DeleteI'd love to know what happened before to lead up to this! And yay for exciting magic!
ReplyDeleteGood job!
Thanks a ton! It's hard to discover magic in way but I think I've found it in the new creatures I'm developing.
DeleteI'm with Emily. I love supernatural stories and this is really good. But I want to know the back story and the significance of the different colors, more of what's going on, and why they are doing this particular ritual on this other person.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE that you caught on to the different color magic. It plays a huge role in my wip.
DeleteI love the way it ended. I wanted to know more.
ReplyDeleteI was considering several scenes and this one spoke the most to me.
Deletesuch intensity! way to bring us into the action!
ReplyDeletewhat a tease =)
have a sweetheart weekend!
You have a wonderful weekend too! I haven't been called a tease in years. ;)
DeleteTotally on the edge of my seat reading this! Great job:)
ReplyDeleteAnd I am sooooo happy to have found another Walking Dead lover!!!! I can't wait until the show starts again. Yep:)
Thanks! I'm glad you liked.
DeleteI know! Walking Dead is the only reason I live for Sundays.
OOH! I love stories with magic/powers. Cool that Reese and Rena are linked! Nice job!
ReplyDeleteThanks! This took forever to write!
DeleteNice job. I've loved getting to know these two. ;0)
ReplyDeleteThat's sweet. I've enjoyed sharing them with everyone. Thanks!
DeleteAgh! What did they do??? This was great! I'm a sucker for powers and magic and have loved getting to know your characters. I hope to own them in book form someday :)
ReplyDeleteOh wow! I'm so curious about what's going on/what they did to Rena
ReplyDeleteOooh, spells and witches and everything. Cool!
ReplyDeleteWitches have fallen out of style in favor of wizzards lately. Great to see the colorful magic and chanted charms again. Excellent portrayal Danielle.
ReplyDeleteI'm catching up on the blogfest; I'll go read the other two posts now also.
........dhole
Oh so scary! I think your book would make me keep bed side lamp on at night! Freaky and cool!
ReplyDeleteI have to admit I come and sneak what you're writing every now and then and I really like it. I'm writing A BIT, too, but I think nothing that I'd like to share with the world. I love that you've got the courage and that you're willing to share some thoughts (because that's what writing basically is about, isn't it?).
ReplyDeleteOn a different note, I tagged you. You can read the whole thing and all about it on my blog: http://itishowyouarenot.blogspot.com/2012/02/ive-been-tagged.html